(to read the previous entries of the What Seeking Infinite Jest Means series, click here for Part 1, here for Part 2, here for Part 3, and here for Part 4)
Blue
“Come on in…doctor”
And just like that, three years of writing, six years after starting my PhD program, over another ten years when I decided I wanted to be a writer, I hear the words all freshly minted PhD students await to hear. I officially completed my PhD program. One career change, an unquantifiable dream, a string of sleepless nights, thousands of miles traveled, surmounting countless steps on a ladder towards this goal, and three time zones later, I accomplished something I genuinely thought was impossible. My advisors bathe me in praise. I swim in it, gracefully. This must be how dolphins feel swimming in their pods. This finish line I thought I’d never reach was now behind me. I officially obtained infinite jest. As I personally thank each of my advisors, I dedicate to each of them an ingredient that makes the perfect Negroni- gin, sweet vermouth, Campari, and a slice of orange. I may possibly be the first person to mix a cocktail during a dissertation defense. Its herbal notes and smooth texture are the well-earned award to six-year long journey. Like my program, like the dissertation revising process, like the years it took just to apply, my defense soon came to an end. Once my advisors left the Zoom meeting, I closed my laptop, ready to engage with life after the PhD.
And then…silence.
